i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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