i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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