would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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