is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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