So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
