K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize