So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize