Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
