She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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