the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize