is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Randomize
