Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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