So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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