chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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