ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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