they need to just BURY HIM!
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
