every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
