Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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