doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
