is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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