im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
