Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
