I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
