I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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