do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Randomize
