Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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