After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
