Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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