I heard we made out
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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