Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
