ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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