is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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