so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
