ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
