too bad you live with your parents still
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
This is the high leading the old right now
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
