Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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