he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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