Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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