$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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