I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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