apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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