Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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