what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
