I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize