I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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