So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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