Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
not ubering you a puppy
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
