I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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