I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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