I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
